Handling Dosmetic Quarrels

  Police are often called to settle domestic quarrels, and frequently the police end up injuring, and sometimes even killing someone.
  I suggest that a better way to handle a highly charged domestic quarrel, would be for the police to have a special unit dressed in Kevlar clown outfits, charge in, accompanied by the loud playing of music and laughter, shooting seltzer water at the arguing persons, and clubbing them with soft rubber hammers.